One Day at a Time
"Look at the step ahead of you and not the whole staircase"
Hi friend!
Life can often feel chaotic and overwhelming, leaving us gasping for breath. Did you know there is a way to navigate these turbulent moments by adopting the approach of living ‘one day at a time? In this blog post, we’ll explore how focusing on the present moment can help reduce stress, increase resilience and lead to greater happiness.
When I was going through my rough patch with mental health and recovery, people would say, "Just take it one day at a time." I would then nod my head, and laugh inside because, in my opinion, that seemed silly. How on earth could I take it one day at a time? Life was only lived one day at a time, I couldn't live a whole year or even a whole week at once no matter how hard I tried. So, I would often feel like Captain Obvious had just spoken and shake off their advice.
The truth is, their advice was solid. Living one day at a time can be looked at as risky, never planning for the future, and only living in the now. That's not what I think this advice means. I think it means focusing on what you can do right now to further yourself along. Then little by little, the steps you take add up to a full journey and you look back and can see how far you've come. Today, I live my life in a 24 hour period. I have learned that ANYTHING can happen in a 24-hour period. It works, it really does- trust me.
So, how do we do it? Let’s dive in!
1, Living in the present makes sense
There’s no need to get deeply philosophical. When it comes to living your life, there is only one time when you have control- RIGHT NOW.
Five minutes ago, and ten minutes from now are not things you can directly determine. That said, the future is something you can help shape. But the point is you can help shape and mold your future by what you do right now.
One of the biggest reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is simply that it makes sense.
Yesterday is what you had.
Today is what you have.
The future is what you might have.
Why not focus on the one thing you can control?
As Thomas Oppong writes:
“Essentially, the only thing you have any influence over is today, so, logically, the present is the only thing you have and can control.
“Dwelling on yesterday’s mistakes or tomorrow’s uncertain decisions means missing out on today.”
2. Leave the if / then world behind
Far too many of us, myself included, have spent years in a life of “if, then” and “when, then.”
This means that if something were different we would be different, and when something is different, then we will try again. Let me tell you, this philosophy will have you still waiting on your deathbed.
Because waiting on the world to change is a losing proposition.
Many realize it too late, but the only power you have is inside you. The outside world is not going to hand you anything on a silver platter or fill that hole you feel inside.
No amount of chasing love, sex, drugs, work, therapy or gurus is going to do that for you.
Instead, it’s vital to take it one day at a time in order to maximize your control and personal power. You can’t wait for some day to be happy because let me tell you, someday might never come! Furthermore, many of those experiences and achievements you crave often turn out to be very underwhelming once you get them.
Instead, focus on what you can do today to experience life.
Omar Itani puts this brilliantly:
“We believe that happiness is an “if-then” or “when-then” proposition: If I find love, I’ll be happy. If I get that job offer, I’ll be happy.
“When I publish my book, I’ll be happy. When I move into my new apartment, I’ll be happy.
“So we end up living our lives in a future state of mind that is completely detached from the present.”
4. You can still be excited about the future but live in the present
Living in the present doesn’t mean that you are now just in a pure state of bliss or “ultra-flow” activation.
You will still think of the past and future: we all do! But you won’t dwell on it as much, if you reframe your priorities.
You can still be excited about your wedding that’s coming up, or your goal of getting super fit by next summer. That’s great! But each day you get up, you’re focused on the day ahead and what you can do in that 24-hour span. You know there will be many more 24-hour spans ahead, hopefully, but you’re not centered on that.
You’re centered on the power of now. Your longer-term goal is there in the back of your head, but your priority is the day in front of you, not a year from now.
One of the top reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is that it empowers you on a daily basis. You can still have future goals, but this will help ensure they don’t just remain as daydreams.
5. Living one day at a time teaches you humility
Another one of the top reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is that it teaches you humility.
Many of us try to obsess over the past or what might happen because it gives us the illusion of controlling things out of our control.
For example you might think: Well, if I meet a girlfriend I really love I’ll stay in that place, if not I’ll leave! Simple!Then you move somewhere new only filtering it through this lens and miss out on many friendships, career connections and other opportunities because you were only hinging your move on romantic outcomes.You then leave this place, ironically missing out on an ideal girlfriend you would have met if you hadn’t been only judging the new place on finding a partner.
And so it goes. This is the problem with living in the future, it makes you feel more in control than you are. It gives you the illusion of control without any of the reality.
Your real control is what you do today. Worry about next year when it comes. For today, live the best day you can.
7. Look after yourself every day
Living one day at a time isn’t the same thing as being reckless. Within the present moment, you can be a very conscientious and detail-oriented person.
In fact, it’s crucial that you do. You must pay attention to your health and wellbeing, in order to ensure you have the mental and physical tools to bring your full energy to each day.
Like Katie Uniacke says:
“You can’t expect to thrive if you’re not giving yourself the necessary fuel and care day in, day out.”
This means eating, sleeping and exercising. It means caring for your hygiene, your energy level, dealing with any health concerns and caring about the environment you live in and how it affects you.
8. Living one day at a time increases your confidence
Another one of the most important reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is that it increases your confidence. It gets you into your body and out of your head.
Instead of being overshadowed by the past or drowned in anxiety or floating in hope about the future, you’re solidly rooted in the now.
Focus on each task you do and bring it care and attention. This will help increase your competence and confidence.
As you see that you can do small things well, you will eventually build to larger tasks and goals day by day.
Many great achievements started with small, quotidian beginnings.
8. Living one day at a time makes you work harder
Living one day at a time actually increases your motivation.
Like I said, you can and should still have long-term goals. The point is to drill down on your daily habits and tasks and get them done to the best of your ability. By getting out of your “monkey mind” from time to time, you will be able to focus on the task at hand.
Your work ethic will improve, as will your focus.
Living one day at a time gives you specific parameters to work within.
Your schedule is day by day, and you do the best you can within that framework, come rain or shine.
9. Living one day at a time helps you see the funny side
We’re living in a crazy and beautiful world, but the pressures and stresses of life can make us forget just how strange and hilarious life can be.
Living one day at a time is like lifting a small pressure off yourself.
You now have a second of mental and emotional space to look around and appreciate – and laugh – at some of what’s around you. How odd this whole life thing is, in a way, don’t you think?
It’s all really quite mind-blowing that we’re all here together sharing this human experience and struggling through our lives in different situations. What an amazing, terrifying, hilarious and sometimes profound experience!
Soak it in. One day at a time, like everyone else.
10. Living one day at a time reduces anxiety
That’s the thing about living one day at a time. It takes a bit of the pressure off, and relieves some of that difficult anxiety that many of us deal with at times. One of the reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is that it helps you calm that anxious part of your physiology and mind which always wants to dwell on a future possibility or past event. This habit draws us into anxious circles and can ultimately lead to really disturbing symptoms.
Be careful of the trap of being overly worried about the future or what might happen, it can be a very time-consuming and exhausting path to go down.
11. Living one day at a time helps you avoid trying to be perfect
Another one of the great reasons it’s vital to live one day at a time is that it helps you avoid the trap of trying to be perfect. Perfect does NOT exist. Its an ILLUSION. With that, we still want to perform at a high level and do your best. But you don’t need to spend your time feeling like a failure because you didn’t get into law school or lost a job a few months ago.
Now you’re focused on what you can do today, even if it’s as simple as running further on your daily jog or eating a healthier meal tonight.
Starting small can have big results. And living day to day gets you out of the mindset that everything needs to be perfect.
That’s a lot of pressure to live under. Focus on today.
13. Living one day at a time is powerful
Another one of the key reasons it’s important to live one day at a time is that it empowers you.
So many things in our current culture are designed to sabotage your personal power.
One of the worst is the constant promotion of victim narratives. Another is the fact that many of us feel lonely and alienated in a world of modern technology.
We’ve never been so connected and yet so disconnected at the same time. So how can you overcome this insecurity that’s been nagging you?
The most effective way is to tap into your personal power.
You see, we all have an incredible amount of power and potential within us, but most of us never tap into it. We become bogged down in self-doubt and limiting beliefs. We stop doing what brings us true happiness.
15. Living one day at a time boosts your self-awareness
Living one day at a time also helps you become much more aware of how your thoughts and actions combine.
When you stop responding to every direction your mind tries to go, you gain a greater discipline and self-awareness. You start to notice behavioral patterns and habits that are bad. And behavioral patterns and habits that are helpful.
The key to this is focusing on small daily tasks which can eventually build up into much bigger projects.
As Mary Heath advises:
“Try to focus on everything that you do, no matter how mundane. Attempt to concentrate on each moment as it presents itself to you.
“Be aware, checking frequently that your thoughts are not dwelling on the past or racing ahead to the future.”
For me, learning to live one day at a time literally changed my life. If anyone were to ask me what is my number one advice- it would be just live- Live one day. One 24 hour period at a time.
What are your thoughts?
XO Jenna
